FIRST IMPRESSION – Rio: Rainbow Gate! Ep. 01 / WE’VE GOT SHINY BIG BOOBS!


So with The Otaku’s Blog 2010/2011 Winter Anime List finally out of the way (AND OMFG I JUST READ THE 2011 SPRING ANIME LIST. GEH MORE WORK), I can now spend some time working on my other blogs such as DGM and KNT’s latest chaps (which I have yet to write about like I said I would), and the first anime impression of Kimi Ni Todoke’s Season 2.

But for now, it’s a first impression of Rio: Rainbow Gate!, an anime based off gambling and big-boobed ladies working as casino dealers whilst wearing sexy-looking aka very-revealing clothes. But the one thing which made me go LMAO on the anime’s ecchi factor was that not only did these ladies have big boobs, but shiny big boobs to be more specific (or atleast, the heroine Rio does). Like terribly shiny big boobs.

THEY'RE FUCKING SHINY. ROFL.

Last time I checked, boobs don’t shine like marbles even if you have THAT much cleavage and aren’t wearing anything underneath. I mean, seriously? You would reckon that the creators, XEBEC, would be a bit more realistic but nup, they like shiny big boobs better.

Oh, and did I mention that this was a mahou shoujo (magical girl) show as well? YUPPP. Our very own heroine has a magical transformation. YAYYYY, now we can finally get over Sailor Moon and start anew with a gambling and more ecchi vers instead /*please hint the sarcasm*


No OP this week, but instead we got a fan service scene instead (pantyshot of course included). Man, I just realised how pale her legs are. Not that I’m a lesbian or anything (though I reckon lesbian couples are hawt ;P), but the only reason I watched this in the first place was cause I was curious as to see how you could run an anime series on ONE SOLE CASHINO STRANDED ON AN ISLAND. And well, to pick up some nice gambling moves along the way, if there were any :)

Our protagonist: MINT.

The answer? NO, THERE WERE NO NICE GAMBLING MOVES. THEY LIED. All I learnt in this ep was that in poker, 2 twos are the weakest pair (is it? never played poker before). And it’s this pair you would have to use in order to kick some stuffed-teddy-fanatic in the ass. WTF much.

Summary:

So our protagonist this time round is a 10 year old girl (or so she looks like one), who in my opinion, is weird. Her name is Mint, and happens to be travelling with her grandpa (some fancy business man) to the Howard Resort, a famous casino (and hotel?) known for its Goddess of Victory aka Rio. Apparently, our heroine Rio can use some kind of special power (?), and just her presence alone can make people hit jackpot. Now where can I buy one of those?

Mint goes for a walk, before fancying herself into following Rio around to rid herself from boredom. Thus why we’re given another pantyshot with Rio wearing a maid costume, thanks to her pervy boss. Blah, blah, blah happens and Mint gets targeted by some ugly, bad blonde guy. LOL YUP. That’s the kind of guys this 10yr old attracts. We get to see a short scene of Rio fighting, before it’s SHOWDOWN: ugly, bad blonde guy vs. shiny big-boobed Rio.

The conditions? If Rio loses she has to give up Mint and strip. Like 100% STRIP. Now wat kind of 10yr old suggests that?

Ofcourse our heroine wins, but not without some weird magical girl transformation sorta thing. Or w/e that creepy part was.

Turns out all the ugly, bad blonde guy wanted was Choco (aka Mint’s teddy bear) and that he’s a crazed toy manic who collects them so that he can soothe his broken heart (he got ditched by his wife 5mins after their wedding; I can see why). Rio than comforts him (though what she said wasn’t really comforting but nevertheless the guy’s stupid enough to fall for it) and everyone’s happy. THE END. Oh, and another panty shot before ED.

Thoughts overall:

Dear Rio: Rainbow Gate!,

As an ecchi anime, you’ve failed. (There were like, what? two – no – three ecchi scenes at most?)
As a mahou shoujo (magical girl) anime, you’ve definitely failed. (Only one person in this world goes through any kind of metamorphosis stage whilst playing poker and that person is Rio)
And as an anime overall, YOU’VE DEFINITELY FAILED FOR YOU HAVE A ONE HELL OF A SCREWED UP 10 YEAR OLD PROTAGONIST WHO FOR SOME REASON ISN’T DISTURBED BY THE PERVYNESS AND TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, KNOWS HOW TO MEASURE YOUR THREE SIZES ACCURATELY IN JUST ONE GLANCE. Do kids like these even exist?

Your ratings are:
Plot:
4/10
Characters: 3.5/10
Graphics: 7.5/10
Music: 5/10

As you can see, you’re definitely not worth my time, but unfortunately for me, I am still curious to see your mega-awesome gambling moves. Please reveal some soon so I can hurry the hell up and get over you.

Love,
Serenata :)

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About Kirakuna

A+ in procrastinating
This entry was posted in 2010/11 - Winter and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to FIRST IMPRESSION – Rio: Rainbow Gate! Ep. 01 / WE’VE GOT SHINY BIG BOOBS!

  1. jacqivarius says:

    You’re going to keep watching? I applaud you.

  2. baka-neko says:

    :O
    SINCE WHEEN ?
    yui you hentai! *slaps her with a fish*

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