NB: This is an old post by Jacqivarius prior to his retirement from the blog. It’s incomplete but comprehensible nevertheless. Think of it as a commemoration of sorts.
There is always a sense of liberation when doing the right thing, a satisfaction that arises only when you know for a certainty that you made the correct decision. And yet there is still doubt. Always there is doubt. Our lives are a culmination of mistakes. We brood on them and wonder “what if?”.
What if I hadn’t missed that test? What if I went to that party? What if I sought solace in the fact that I tried my best? What if I did try my best?
What if? What if? What if? What if? What if? What if? What if? What if? What if? What if?
We are plagued by the question. We are human because we are ever wrought by anger and sadness, lingering in the past, wallowing in our own self depreciation.
While watching the above video I began to contemplate my life. Sugimoto Kousuke’s works do that to you. I wonder if I will regret my lack of desire or perhaps my languid what of living. I’m sure that I will.